Have you ever found yourself thinking that the success of a coaching session is a reflection of your own success as a coach?
To what extent do your expectations from yourself and your coachee’s expectations match?
After a coaching session, how often do we, as coaches, feel like we could have done more or pushed the client further to achieve a breakthrough? We believe we simply did not provide enough…
These questions can linger in our minds, and we may feel that the session was not as useful as it could have been or that we could have remembered a fantastic technique that would have made a difference.
Recently, I had a conversation with a friend to whom I recommended a coach. After several sessions, I received feedback from both sides. From my friend’s perspective, a good relationship was established, and the space provided to talk about important things was valuable. She appreciated the opportunity to hear herself and found it to be a pleasant experience. On the other hand, the coach felt that the session should have been more effective and powerful. She believed that there was more chatting than a real coaching conversation, and there was no “incredible ‘AHA'” moment.
This led me to wonder how we, as coaches measure the success of coaching sessions.
On my journey from ACC to PCC, I learned how to be more flexible and focus more on the whole person level, as defined by the International Coaching Federation. Also, that it is okay to challenge coachees and offer an opinion “without attachment” and be ready to hear and learn from the coachee during the process.
In some video interview I recently watched, Kirsten Dierolf, ICF MCC, ICF ACTC, EMCC MP, ESIA, ITCA MP shared an advice that I find precious. “We are the best coaches we can be in the moment with our client.” This means that we should be present in the session, bringing our focus and attention to the coachee, not thinking about what we might be doing wrong or what we can do better.
I have also learned from my mentor Jelena Pavlovic, PhD, PCC, that it is okay to share our thoughts with the coachee and ask them if there is a way to create a more valuable coaching experience. I understand this advice as a message to be open, honest, and authentic and to admit that we are human beings there to support other human beings in reaching their desired change.
I know there is a lot to learn yet. I wonder how it feels to coach on the MCC level, to be in the space of not knowing, constantly okay with following the client, and letting go of all techniques and methods.
To conclude, success in coaching sessions is not always about achieving a specific outcome or defining some future activity. It’s about being present and bringing our full focus to the coachee while also being flexible and open to the unexpected.
So, I invite you to reflect on your own coaching practice and ask yourself:
How do you measure the success of your coaching sessions?
